PURIFY THE INNER SELF FIRST – by Saint Augustine

"Consider what John recommends to us: 'By this we shall know that we belong to the truth'—when we love through deeds and in truth, and not merely in word and with the tongue—'and we shall have a quiet conscience before God.' What does 'before God' mean? It means where God sees. That is why the Lord Himself says in the Gospel: 'Do not do good so that men may see you, for then your heavenly Father will not reward you.' What is the meaning of the precept 'do not let your left hand know what your right hand is doing' (Mt 6:1, 3), if not that the right hand represents a pure conscience while the left represents greed? Many people do many admirable things out of the lust of the eyes; in that case, the left hand is acting, not the right. It is the right hand that ought to act, yet without the left hand knowing, so that the lust of the eyes does not interfere in the slightest when we do something good out of love. And how do we know this? Stand before God and question your heart; look at what you have done and ask whether your aim was your own salvation or mere human vainglory. Look within, for a man cannot judge what he cannot see. If we are to quiet our hearts, let us quiet them before God. For 'if our conscience condemns us'—that is, if it accuses us inwardly because we are not doing things as we ought—'God is greater than our conscience and knows everything.' You, who are able to hide the depths of your heart from others, try doing the same with God—see if you can. How could you hide it from Him of whom a sinner, filled with fear and repentance, once said: 'Where can I go far from Your spirit? Where can I flee from Your gaze?' He sought a place to flee to escape God's judgment, yet found none; for is there any place where God is not? 'If I ascend to the heavens, You are there; if I lie down in the abyss, there I find You' (Ps..." 138:7–8). Where will you go? Where will you flee? Do you want some advice? If you wish to flee from Him, flee *to* Him. Flee to Him by confessing to Him—not by hiding from Him, for you cannot hide from Him, but you *can* confess all your sins to Him. Say to Him: "You are my refuge" (Ps 31:7), and nourish love within yourself—the only thing that leads to life. 

 Commentary on the First Letter of Saint John, VI, 3; SC 75.