The art of renaming adultery

 

In today’s world, we have perfected an extraordinary skill: renaming what used to be called sin, dressing it up with softer and more acceptable words. So, when someone says they are “rebuilding their life,” what they are really doing is finding an elegant way to say they have fallen into adultery. Because, of course, who would dare call things by their proper name when we can soften them with a bit of creative language?

“Rebuilding your life” sounds almost like a noble task, as if abandoning a marriage were some kind of personal improvement project. How useful the euphemism is! We no longer talk about breaking promises or betraying a sacred sacrament; instead, adultery is presented as an opportunity for “rediscovery.” But the reality, even if we dress it up, remains the same: the act of rebuilding one’s life is, at its core, undoing the life one vowed to share in fidelity.

We find ourselves in an era where words have the power to transform the perception of things, but not their essence. “Rebuilding your life” is nothing more than a modern formula to say that the marital bond has been broken and adultery has been embraced—with a marketing twist. It’s as if, by changing the words, we also change the meaning of the act. But no matter how much we soften it, adultery remains what it is: a grave sin.

The most ironic thing about all of this is that the process of “rebuilding” is portrayed as a heroic act. The adulterer presents themselves as someone who has overcome an obstacle, when in reality they have avoided the most fundamental commitment. It doesn’t take courage to “rebuild” your life; it takes a lack of courage to stay faithful to what was promised. In the end, the phrase is an excuse dressed in self-pity.

So, let’s return to the original point: “rebuilding your life” is nothing more than a clever way of renaming adultery, a way of disguising betrayal and presenting it as a fresh start. But the truth doesn’t change, no matter how many times we try to dress it up. In the end, rebuilding one’s life after having given a word in a sacrament is nothing other than undoing what God has united, and calling it by another name does not make it virtuous.

See:

http://www.catholicityblog.com/2015/12/rebuilding-your-life.html